Where’s the Sizzle?

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Remember when you first met your spouse and your heart would flip-flop whenever you looked at them? Enter kids. I’m going to be a terrible person and say straight up what every new parent thinks: children are an absolute blessing, but they are also a wet blanket.

At the end of the day, when the kids are finally asleep, my husband and I usually flop down exhausted on opposite ends of our couch. We spend an hour or so staring blankly at each other before stumbling up to bed.

The other night, we decided it was time to do something drastic. It was time to recapture the romance. We had it all planned out. We would put the kids to bed early and then spend some time together, just us. Quality time. No television, no computer, no comic books (um, that last one applies to him, not me). Sounds like a dream come true, eh?

You know what happened? As soon as we put our three-month old to bed, she began to cry. She cried. And she cried. And she cried some more. She cried into the late hours of the night. Our evening was spent trying to console her – except that she was inconsolable.

You know what happened when she finally calmed down? We flopped down exhausted on opposite ends of our couch and spent an hour or so staring blankly at each other before stumbling up to bed.

I’m thinking that it’s time to: (a) teach our littlest darling how to take a bottle … so that we can (b) find a sitter within our budget (which would be free – any volunteers?). Then we can go out for a nice walk and just spend some uninterrupted time together.

So now it’s your turn. All you other new parents out there, what do you do to keep the pizazz in your relationship?

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2 thoughts on “Where’s the Sizzle?

  1. I’m glad we’re not the only couple that goes through this! My kids are 3 and 4, and the past few years have had many times when we have, as you say: “flopped down exhausted on opposite ends of our couch and spent an hour or so staring blankly at each other before stumbling up to bed.”!!

    We have tried different things, but I’ll share one of the more successful dates we have had at home.
    We worked together to get the kids to bed, then I actually made my husband leave the house for a half hour while I set up a hot stone grill in the basement, lit candles, got a little dressed up and put on music. He showed up at the front door, (with roses!) and wearing a shirt and tie, and was very suprised to see how I had set everything up! We sat and slowly cooked a Korean BBQ meal on the grill, chatted and reconnected as a couple for a short time. It was quite romantic and a great memory in the midst of the blur of parenting tiny children!

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  2. well for us we try to do small things like play a game of cards, find a topic that we want to talk about(non kid related) such as dreams, how to reach out and meet our neighbours ect. we try to on our wedding anniversary to go away for a weekend with out the kids. Mark has always been great at making plans for that. one year we went away up to horseshoe..he loves to golf and i love to go to the spa and it had both! it was fun being out on the course with him driving around and watching him golf. The down side was he got the flu while we where there but we made the most of it…lets just say that it was a bit expensive way to just lay around in bed thats for sure lol. I think often we just get so caught up in the go big or dont do it at all that before we know it, its been 3 months and no date night. I think its important to mark it on your calander even if its just a walk and get out, be a couple and not always Mom and Dad.

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