Bipolar Faith and Disappointed Hopes

Have you ever pinned your hopes on something, only to have it fall through? Recently, I heard a true story about a pastor and his wife who had a “faith ministry”. The couple travelled all over, preaching messages about faith and healing. Then, the pastor contracted cancer and died.

If that were my husband, my faith would have been shaken to the core. This woman, on the other hand, had a different perspective. Soon after her husband’s death, she got back into the pulpit and preached a message about how we should never, ever get angry at God or let circumstances shake our faith. Despite losing the person she loved the most, her faith was stronger than ever.

I’m so glad I heard that story. Yesterday we had an appointment to see if my husband is eligible for a government retraining program. Since the day he lost his job, I had believed with all my heart that God had closed that door in order for Dave to go back to school. I thought that the retraining program was our “promised land”, an opportunity for Dave to pursue his dreams.

I was wrong. He arrived at the appointment and was informed that he is ineligible for the program.

“What a difference a day makes/ Twenty-four little hours” – The song couldn’t be more true.  Yesterday morning, I was on top of the world. I was excited about God’s provision and had completely expected that the retraining program was the door that God was going to open. I walked out of the appointment stunned.

Do you ever feel like you have bipolar faith? One second you are on top of the world and the next second you feel like the world is crumbling beneath you?

Proverbs 13:12 says that hope deferred makes the heart sick. There will always be disappointments in life. But here’s what we have to remember: God’s ways are not our ways and His thoughts are higher than our thoughts (Isaiah 55:8-9). He is working behind the scenes to create something beautiful out of our lives.

So what next for my hubby? I have no idea. But like that pastor’s wife, I can’t let disappointments (however small in comparison to hers) shake my faith. God is still in control and He is still going to provide.

Although I might not see it now, God’s plan is much better than mine.

“Whoever believes in Him will not be disappointed.” (Romans 10:11)





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